Get your flow on and poker face off -Making virtual body language count
Lady Gaga’s lines: “Can’t read my, can’t read my. No, he can’t read my poker face…” is now more apt than ever with Online meetings on the rise.
Attending and hosting virtual engagements may be a daily routine for quite a bit of the workforce in 2020. If this is the new norm, do you have a new form to make the most of it?
Kinesics is the interpretation of body motion in nonverbal communication. This would typically be facial expressions and gestures, or any nonverbal behaviour related to the movement of any part of the body or the body as a whole.
Using kinesics to your advantage is key in having meaningful connections and building trust with the recipients. Having an authentic meaningful engagement is part of being in flow — the mental state in which a person is fully immersed in a feeling of energized focus.
If you are not sure where you stand when it comes to your kinesic abilities try the following activity:
Sit comfortably in front of your camera (as you would when having an online meeting). Switch it on and hit record. Then simply complete the following sentences:
- I simply love it when…
- The worst meeting, I can remember was when…
- The topic I want to gain more knowledge on is…
Once you are done, play it back and take note of your facial expressions, and tone of voice attached to the emotions in each of those sentences.
If you are like me, getting over the hurdle of having to watch yourself, or listen to yourself will be the first thing you pat yourself on the back for. It’s a Johari window kind of moment, looking at your possible blind spots. Both positive and negative emotions are all part of communicating and will have a place in having meaningful engagements.
Here are some tips to consider:
o Positive emotions involve upturned corners of the mouth — a smile when you speak. A genuine smile is something that our brains subconsciously detect. Open palms and nodding or an upturned face are all positive movements.
o Negative emotions are generally displayed by creased eyebrows and lowered shoulders or crossed arms. Puffed out chests, extended arms or very closed postures could indicate anger. Needless to say, pointing a finger or a clenched fist on the table are all negative emotive signals. Stifling a yawn, holding your chin in your hands or constantly looking away or down show disinterest.
o Expressions of interest are indicated by leaning in or looking directly at the camera. Open body postures are also key to showing signs of attention. Tilting the head to one side or holding a finger to the chin are both seen as contemplation in conversation.
Camera positioning to incorporate your hands and shoulders are key in getting the most out of your window of opportunity to connect.
Opting out of using your camera, may mean that you lose out on the opportunity to build relationships in the best way possible, with the tools that you have at your disposal.
There are many other ways, you can improve on having meaningful conversations, and the best people to ask are the people around you. Asking your friends, a question around how they know you are happy or angry are great ways to get to know yourself a little better… and if you are like me, where my words are visible on my face, then they should have lots to tell you.
While these are not exhaustive, the benefit of using them to effectively get your message across is a great start to reading your poker face 😊
